Monday, October 24, 2005 -- Journaling

I know this journal right here rarely has pictures and is usually filled with words, which kinda makes it hard to read. As a result, I created the fancy blog which is linked at the top of the page. It supports pictures easier and organizes my entries better. I even have a xanga that quite a few poeple subscribe to. However, despite all the efforts of trying to attract people to read my blogs, I feel a sense of uneasiness.

I felt like I was writing for an audience and I'm trying to satisfy their needs. Somehow there's this urge to be popular on xanga, which is absolutely ridiculous because I want to write about my thots and journal down what I truely feel (to a more honest extent). I just can't quite write the same things I do at my own journal that I've first created. This journal I've created 2 years ago is so simple. I simply use perl script to format whatever I type, sometimes I even use frontpage just so I can squeeze a few pictures in. The organization is so terrible because I have to organize them the hard way by actually dragging the code around. However, somehow in the midst of this supposedly inferior online journal that I've created, I feel so much more open to talk about whatever that is going on. 

Another great thing is, 10 or 20 years down the road, I will still have all the text and have the ability to easily manipulate them. Just imagine having to backup xanga at some point of your life for you own personal use. There's almost no way you can reproduce the smilees, special effects and what that one has put on xanga on your own computer. I wonder why one would write all the stuff about their lives on xanga and not be able to retrieve it. The idea frightens me. Even though my entries might be boring, at least I have them at my disposal easily. And I like it. Sometimes simple is better. But then again, who cares, I'm writing really for myself, not for others. That's why it's called journaling (or logging or whatever). but I guess nobody really reas this journal anyway. It's not like people really pay attention to what I write. oh well...

Aleck 11:39:27 PM